Doctor, my mother wrote me today. “Bjorn Bjornsson Quifqvist with your luscious cheeks, I think you should name your penis Attila.” That is all she wrote, but I know why she said it: because I came to America to pillage and plunder female genitals!
Updates from bjornbjornssonquifqvist RSS Toggle Comment Threads | Keyboard Shortcuts
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Britney Spear and Halle Berry have lesbian sex!!
I want to watch that, doctor.
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docliptz
THIS IS FAMILY WEBSITE, YOU SON OF BITCH! How many times I have to tell you that bad words are not fucking allowed here?
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
In Sweden, lesbian sex is a family pass-time. Nothing else to do but have anus sex with reindeer.
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docliptz
If I understand you correctly, anus means “I love you,” so you have “I love you sex” with reindeer?
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Yes. I love reindeer. That is why I have sex with them.
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bmuntz
YOU ARE ALL SICK FUCKS! HOW DARE YOU SULLY THE GOOD NAME OF REINDEER WITH YOUR EVIL PENIS? THIS IS EXAMPLE OF TIME CUBE ILLOGICAL THINKING. NOW IS THE TIME TO REPENT! THERE IS NOTHING GODLY ABOUT STUPID AND EVIL ADULTS WHO BETRAY THEIR OWN CHILDREN WHO GAVE THEM LIFE. I AM WISER THAN ANY DAMN MAN OR GOD WHO EVER EXISTED. IF THE HALF AND HALF CO-CREATED JESUS RETURNS TO EARTH, I WILL PERSONALLY KILL THE BASTARD MYSELF. ALL CREATION OCCURS BETWEEN AND AS OPPOSITES. YOU DUMB-ASS, EARTH, THE UNIVERSE AND EVERY LIVING THING IN IT
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docliptz
Note to self: give Bob more meds.
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This was very helpful. I bookmark your site. I will visit again soon.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Anus
Doctor, did you know the word “anus” means “I love you” in Swedish? But if you put the stress on the second syllable, it means “grandma’s ovaries,” so be careful!
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Cool website, I hadn’t noticed psychoexperiments.wordpress.com before during my searches!
Carry on the wonderful work!-
docliptz
thanks be to god that you found us – we are happy to be having you!
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docliptz
In Bulgaria, anus means “hamburger,” so it was surprising to me to read it in your post. Now I am hungry for Wendy’s. I hear Wendy is really hot, and I am big fan of redhead womens, so this will be a good trip to eat.
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Pieter
You have no idea what you’re talking about, do you?
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
I have an årabian neighbør and his name is pronounced “anus” but it is spelled abu-dhabi-jalalalah. I think it’s ahmed anus, actually.
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docliptz
My ‘stache is what gets the ladies, Corona Del Mar.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
My sleeveless ABBA t-shirt and my Viking helmet too.
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Asghar
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
BJORN!
Døctor, I realized something about my glorious cøuntry of Sweden today. Our twø greatest contributions to mankind are both written with big letters: ABBA and IKEA. So from nøw on I would like to write my name in big letters too: BJORN. It goes with my big penis. But the government won’t allow it! (Big letters. Big penises they do allow.)
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docliptz
You are in denial.
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Lonnie Quealy
Yeah so true, keep the info coming buddy, you are on the mark! Social media marketing is on the rise, but it’s hard to get individuals to convert with out a bit of softening up first.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Can I borrow your pants?
Doctør, I found this picture of you. Can I børrow your pånts for dancing with Americån females tonight?
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docliptz
I AM VERY ANGRY! WHERE DID YOU FIND PICTURE OF MY SECRET STASH? I NOT GIVE THESE PICTURES TO MUNTZ TO GIVE TO YOU.
THESE pants are only for special occasions, when i make very sexy sex with ladies. You cannot borrow, they are very rare pants you son of bitch.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
I helped Al Gøre invent the internet. It is Swedish for “have no sex life.” I have åccess to everything! I am Gøøgle!
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docliptz
You son of bitch fat Sweden guy! I hates you! Now I am going to find embarrasing picture of you having sex with Mel Gibson and post it.
Also, your check bounced.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Scrabble
Døctor, why åre there never enough q’s in American Scråbble when I play with Pappa Quifqvist and Mamma Quifqvist and great-Pappa Quifman Qvist?
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docliptz
Bjorn, this is stupid question and I hate you now because you make me feel stupid. What is Scrabble? Is that like traditional Bulgarian dance game Detstvo? As we say in Bulgaria, “make a person happy with a woman while dancing.”
I’m sorry, I do not hate you. I pity you and your failure to understand how your porn addiction is crippling your ability to perceive reality.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Scrabble is like the Swedish game Knøtteknøttekøl but with pieces of wood instead of meatballs.
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bjornbjornssonquifqvist
Hållo from Helsingbørg!
I åm pleased that you are åccepting my möney to fix my brain on this blõg. Pappa Quifqvist always said, “Bjorn Bjornsson, as long as you keep wearing your sweatband, your bråin will not stink like rotten herring!” Females here in America laugh at my sweatband. But I tell them, “You don’t know a real man untîl you have snacked on a Swede!” Then I make öbscene movements with my Nökia cell phone.
Doctor, where do I meet a good Swedish woman? I need her to pickle my herring, butter my smørrebrod, and feed me IKEA meatballs from between her måmmaries. Is that too much to åsk for in this country of free speech? I will send you a jar of my favørite herring, Doctor, if you tell me the secret to plûndering females in this country.
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docliptz
Bjorn, women are for more than pickling the herrings and feeding meatballs. They are wonderful creatures full of delight and whimsy and wonder. They also can cook. If you find woman who is good at all the above, then you will find real Bob Dylan in land of Justin Biebers. Your sex-obsessed personality disorder find itself wholly dissovlved from ego, which mean that hot american women will not want to speak with you, instead they will want me more. i have doctorate from phoenix onlines.
in other news, hot womens who like doctors should email me at docliptz@gmail.com I will pull my craigslist ad if that happen. -
docliptz
Also, I will need check from you. my landlord say he want money today or he take away my pigeon cage from the roof.
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bmuntz
FIRST YOU GET THE MONEY, THEN YOU GET THE POWER, THEN YOU GET THE WOMEN.
HAVE SEXY CUBAN ACCENT TOO.
HI DOCTOR FUCKSTICK.
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docliptz
Damnit Bob, how many times have I tell you to not curse on blog? It makes people scared of you and women not want to come.
Bjorn, just ignore him. He’s mentally unbalanced.
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docliptz
Yes it should be changed every few months, that’s why I change it! Thank you for being our friend!
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Asghar, 
bjornbjornssonquifqvist, 
docliptz, and 3 others are discussing. 
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docliptz 4:40 pm on August 31, 2010 Permalink |
I do not know if you can please anyone with your thingie. I could not see it under your gigantic belly, bjorn. you should try one of those penis enhancement pills. I’m sure they work.
bjornbjornssonquifqvist 10:21 pm on September 2, 2010 Permalink |
Why are you looking for my thingie anyway, doctor? You are supposed to be examining my head, not my scrotum. No licky-licky the herring for you!
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