I FOUND A PICTURE OF THE DOCTOR. I WILL SHOW HIS WIFE AND GET MONEY.
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bmuntz
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dvandelmar
Krusty has the perfect answer to our financial mess. By the way, the economy is not terrible. 3% GDP in the second quarter and about the same it appears in the third. That’s solid economic growth. The financial mess we’re in (hyped and skewed by reporters who have no understanding of it) is not a reflection of the overall economy. No accounts have been liquidated because of insolvencies. Saying it “is” sheds light on how little anyone actually understands. Makes great headlines in a political year. People will take a hit in 401ks. That’s risk. Shit happens. Things will come back in time. Only those who panic and sell will lose their ass. The reality is that it’s a great buying opportunity. I put my kids in cash last week, not because I’m a genius. I had a target in a stock then hit it and sold. I plan to look closely at AIG and GE. Down a ton but solid companies. I’m not pulling the trigger yet. Only pessimists shout the sky is falling. I’m no victim. What I love about conservatives is they pick themselves up and move on. They don’t sit around and wait for hurricanes to hit. Loot a bunch of stores then blame the government for not getting them out while standing on rooftops after the levies break. The guys who came to their rescue are the cajun conservatives who got their families out, then went back to help those who not only were too stupid to vote but watch the Weather Channel. Gallup poll on who would be best with the economy: Obama 48, Krustworthy 45. About a month ago Krusty was down 16 points. Tide is turning and will wash the left wing brainwashing out to sea. Love to be American this month.
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dvandelmar
I feel for you. You have a brave face while staring at certain death. Obama feels a lot like Custer at his last stand. I promise I won’t rub Obama’s certain loss in your face in January.
If she’s a “hockey mom,” she’s willing to go to blows in the stands. She’ll pull out a Dirty Harry special and put a few holes in Putin. I have complete faith in her. I remain steadfast in this decision to have Sarah Palin as my vice president. I’m wetting myself at the thought of Obama, a completely inexperienced and very easy to rattle guy, being number one on the ticket. Palin is number two. You compare an apple to a gun on this one. Krusty vs. Obama. It’s a no brainer. By the way, have you seen Biden lately? I think Obama may yank him and install Hillary. If Obama’s pride hadn’t gotten in his way, he would be up on McCain by at least 25 points. Now he’s having to kiss the Clinton’s asses to stay competitive. Makes me sick to see Obama sprint to clinton’s office and suck cock for help. Not very presidential in my eyes.
Here’s the reality. You all are prep school elitists who look down your noses at guys who attended the DeVry Universities of the world. The fact is the successful guys I know rarely attended elitist universities. You claim she has an IQ of 90. Just the ability to stand in front of 38.5M people and hit a home run speech, tells me that it hovers around 100. I know you struggle with the thought of a Harvard educated man, who is as liberal as they come, and is changing positions with the fluidity and predictability of the tides, getting hammered by a veteran who has actually serviced his country and can barely jerk off with his broken arms. McCain is Change. Palin forever. Drill baby drill. Kill wolves. Let God direct our foreign policy.
I welcome this change that really isn’t change, because I can’t stand to see Obama begging. Begging the Clinton’s for salvation.
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dvandelmar
I stalked a gal for a few days until I saw her walk out of her house. It was dark. She wore a leather jacket down past her rear. I could see the outline. Not bad. Enough for fun. A friend had mentioned her as a possibility. I called her, and we met for lunch. I had a party to attend on Friday night. She came with me. A bunch of beers into the night. She grabbed my hand and asked me to leave. We drove to my house and poured one last cocktail and sat on the couch. Not sure if I even took a sip before I ripped her clothes off. No foreplay. She loves to talk in the middle. I love it. She wants it harder. It wasn’t working. I stalled for some time. Too drunk. Fell asleep. Out cold.
At about 3am something is wrong. Code Red stands above me. She’s whimpering. Feels rejected. Fully dressed. Even wearing her overcoat. I had barely been with her. Only a couple dates. She expects what? So I’m drunk. I fall asleep. We’re far from married. Isn’t she supposed to be trying to land me? Best foot forward? The pressure. The best in bed are those who allow. They ask you to stop and try later. Code Red expects volumes. Immediately. Too much pressure.
She says she’s going to walk home. Completely outrageous. At least four miles away, and it’s bitterly cold. I jump into a pair of jeans and fleece. I told her I’ll drive her. We get to my car, and she cries harder. She asks why I don’t care. This is our first date. Can you imagine being married to this. No wonder why she’s divorced. I said flatly that she gets to make a choice. Come back to bed, or go home. She comes back to bed. I deliver a courtesy. She cuddles next to me for the remainder of the darkness.
I called her six months later on a warm sunny evening. A few scotches in. She was engaged after having known a guy for three weeks.
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dvandelmar
You are so rattled and clinging to hope that someone in the real world will read this shit you send from the internet. We all know the commercials are rooted in fact. Stretched a little, but there is fact. I harken back to Barnacle Bill and his seemingly fruitless search for a head coach. You will survive with Sarah as your VP. The sun will return in the east. The birds will sing with joy. Children will grow up to love Krusty.
The reality is Obama is under the gun and not tested. This test is nothing compared to the games we will face with Putin in the future. Krusty will stand tall to Putin. He knows the cold war. Obama looks too feminine. Putin will kick his ass. Putin knows Krusty didn’t jack off for six years while he was strung up from a pole in an NVA POW camp. Can you imagine not blowing a load for that long? I’d cave for certain. Not Krusty.
You saw the pictures of Putin in the river. He’s borderline insane. He sent a battleship to the Caribbean to run maneuvers with Hugo Chavez. He’s in talks with Cuba to reestablish ties. The guy is a major threat to this country in time. I view him as a borderline Hitler prior to invading Austria. I want a tough son of a bitch in office who will stand up to him. There’s only one candidate who has proven balls and that is Krusty.
Rest assured Putin would love a soft, borderline homosexual to face off against. Krusty would bite him and poke his eyes out. Obama would try to bullshit his way out with rhetoric.
Bottom line, it’s us against the Reds. I trust Krusty.
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dvandelmar
Its so bad. MSNBC and CNN went so far left I had to turn it. I struggled with Fox and the Weather Channel.
Obama is starting to fray. The pig comment wasn’t smart. He needs to leave her alone and let Biden go after her. Biden is out in left field. Not sure what he looks like. But maybe he corners her as some right wing creationist ushering retardation to our shores … might work.
Gergen doesn’t understand why they have Palin in a box.
AC 360 did a fact check on Palin. Here is what he came up with:
She tripled spending on special needs kids. Not cut by 60 percent. She cares about the retard.
We all know she’s full of shit on earmarks. But as long as Rove keeps shoveling this shit to southern Ohio and WalMart nation, we win. Honestly, if she’s a “maverick,” I’m a fucking queer. Doesn’t matter. The public is too stupid to tell the difference.
She never banned books from the Wasilla library but did check on some — assume it was pornography. Tough hit. Essential the skin rags pull through.
Never said to not teach darwinism but did think the creationism side should be presented to the kids. Evolution might be too much for the retard’s brain. I get it.
She thinks shooting wolves from a plane is good. Polar bears have some issues as well. Not sure what drilling has to do with polar bears. Here’s a fact I believe. Once you shoot shit, hunters want them preserved so they can continue to shoot this shit. And she loves to shoot shit. Bottom line. Global warming is not going to be prevented by 600,000 people living in AK. That wilderness is massive beyond massive. People who live there may have some play in a hundred miles max in any direction of a city. But that doesn’t scratch the surface.
If I were an ultra wealthy guy, I’d start a news service in the middle. I’d have a guy on the right, a guy on the left, and Gergen. What you see are multi righters or lefters against only one on the opposite side. AC 360 could host. He’s a fag I know, but does a good job of being in the middle.
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dvandelmar
Still haven’t heard from code red. With any luck I won’t. At this point, I’m terrified. I just had my cell go off and I didn’t answer, because I didn’t recognize the number. No message. Very hazardous.
Trig is a retard. I get that. Just not why he’s being used for political capital. Let him live his retard life without any fanfare. Shouldn’t he be allowed?
Wasn’t sure by the way things started. Out for dinner. Had a couple beers by myself. I have bad gas. Hammered the joint a couple times for fun. I love sitting silently watching people freak. Slow how the odor penetrates. A sniff. Try to hold your breath. Then they vacate. They get absolultely pissed. I could hear the comments if one or another did it and how disgusting. I doubt they know I do it.
Fortunately, Overcoat showed after the air had cleared. She had a couple friends. Rough ones. We’re sitting at the bar and Flip Flop shows up with a friend. That’s tough and I was getting tougher. First thing is to fire up a couple fast scotchies for moral support. Flip Flop sits next to me her friend runs interference for her. Overcoat is lost. I’m lost. But hard and trying to figure out how not to lose the night. I called a friend from the bathroom for advice but he’s gone. Probably sleeping with the woman to whom he’d been married before. At least I have that going for me.
Maybe it’s best that each learn that I’ve slept with the other in the last week. Let’s get it out. I actually look forward to the verbal asaault from all of them. I pull my seat back to form a semi-circle. But how to have conversation with all of them? Flip Flop is the brightest gal I’ve met. Overcoat has tits, but they’re fake.
Overcoat and her friends leave. Flip flop leaves. I ask the gay bartender for a double. Pound it. My phone rings and it’s Overcoat. This is America.
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dvandelmar
I don’t know much about her. Guns don’t bother me at all. If you live in Alaska, you shoot shit to eat. I think hunting is perfectly fine. Creationism totally freaks me out. Kids get knocked up. He’s a great looking guy. I refuse to judge that. Mccain certainly shook things up. I have a hard time believing he really wants her. She may be a great fuck.
I’m pissed because I hear there’s a picture of Bristol in a bikini and i’m trying to find it to check out her ass.
Mark my words. Pallin will go toe to toe with Biden in the debate. And if it turns to energy which it will, she smokes Biden. She runs a virtual country up there that borders Russia. This vaults her to a position of respect. Then all the gun toters march to the polls to cast a tally against Osama. I’m buying a gun. Huge semi-automatic with a night scope. The tree huggers down the street … I’m shooting their wildlife. All of it.
She kills moose. Makes me horny and insane.
I’m moving from this shit hole Connecticut to the great northern territories.
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dvandelmar
The Squirter
Rest assured scotch is involved. But usually on my end. 2 am after the country club on a random Wednesday evening there may be a voice mail. I may turn the wheel. This gal drowns me. It’s more like having sex in a swamp. Went to Evita in Boston, and she wanted to fuck prior to the show which meant I had to sleep in it. Sorry. The bed is so soaked I cannot sleep. Not in my house any longer. If you go down on her, a minimal requirement is a snorkel, dry suit and mask. My friend the sex Phd says I have a squirter. It’s at least 6 to 8 ounces of fluid. Makes me nauseous. The first time it happened I thought she pissed on me. She was on top and I had to close my eyes and not look at her any more. I was so disgusted I couldn’t finish. I was angry. The sex Phd made me sniff my mattress. He claims no smell of urine is indicator of squirtage. It didn’t last long.
A male antelope with all four hooves firmly planted, legs cocked. The final hope is a thrusting hard right turn. All the foward momentum must change direction in one quick motion with no loss of speed. Behind, a hungry lioness with fully extended claws and one paw up ready to swat once again at an already bloodied hind quarter. Life as a single male: An antelope, running for his life.
Damn did I take it on the chin tonight.
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dvandelmar
Scene 1:
Got home at 4:15 am. Brutal. Went back to the well. Drove to her house with a hardon and robe. Told her I’m not coming over unless she’s on all fours in the kitchen with a vibrator shoved up her pussy. It’s outrageous that it takes this kind of degradation to get me wound up. It’s wrong. And I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. I’m pissed I was with this gal again. It’s no good. But hit the desperation button.
It’s amazing how many women hate me now. It’s a nightmare. And I don’t talk. I can’t figure out how they know.
Scene 2:
I think she’s a dental hygienist. The concern I have is that she has written about me walking past her while she’s naked. That rings of commitment. As though I should give her more. And more is not something of which I am capable. We did sleep together, so there is an implied contract. However, with her I can use the same line I use with the others. “You are too recently divorced to be allowed to date or even get serious. You must keep yourself safe and the smartest thing to do is just have fun and keep it light. It’s against the rules to fall in love until a minimum of a year post divorce.”
I figure with this criteria I have a year. Then it’s legal for them to fall in love. I’m going to fuck her once more then roll to the next. I need to fill the pipeline though. I’ve been with the same gals now for awhile and I’m utterly bored. It’s also getting dicey. Thank God I didn’t go to Charlie Brown’s on Saturday. I was told the squirter was there and haven’t taken one of her calls in months. I can only imagine a drunk squirter interrogating me about why I am such a fucking asshole male chauvinist …
