Jenn Ex


Jenn Ex

Last night my jazz quartet played a gig at a Memphis restaurant and my ex girlfriend Jenn was there. I’m certain that this is the chick who gave me herpes three years ago when we dated for six months. The day after an all-out scrodfest, she told me she couldn’t do me again because she was having an outbreak.

So after the jazz band plays, she’s flirting with me. I can’t stand this bitch, but she won’t leave me alone. I leave around 11:00, go home and down a few extra strengh Tylenols. My head’s been thumping since that crank bender this weekend.
As soon as I pass out, Jenn bangs on my window and wakes me up. She’s way too drunk to drive, so I let her in and, of course, bang her even more senseless. I leave her on the floor and go up to my own bed to sleep alone and happy.

This morning the skank is still passed out on my floor. I step over her, get dressed, go out for breakfast, then down to the studio. When I got home tonight she was gone, so at least she’s not dead. She left me a note, which went into the garbage disposal without being read.

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